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Ethan Slater’s Ex-Wife Reflects on Divorce in Long Essay


Ethan SlaterLilly Jay’s ex-wife reflected on their split in an essay and revealed that she never thought she would get divorced.

Slater and Jay’s marriage collapsed earlier this year, and the Broadway actor went on to date his “Wicked” co-star. Ariana Grandewho also separated from her ex-husband, Dalton Gómez.

Grande and Slater’s relationship was widely considered controversial due to its timing and the public backlash they received afterward.

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Ethan Slater’s ex-wife says she misses her ‘life of invisibility’

Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay
Instagram | Ethan Slater

Lilly Jay, a clinical psychologist specializing in perinatal mental health and child development, wrote an essay for The cut published on December 18. In the article, she recounted the difficulties she faced after the fallout from her marriage to Slater and her life as a mother to her two-year-old son.

Jay began by stating that no one gets married thinking they will get divorced or gets on a plane expecting it to crash. She continued, “But I never really thought I’d get divorced. Especially not right after giving birth to my first child and especially not in the shadow of my husband’s new relationship with a celebrity.”

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The mother of one of them expressed that she was in a time of shock and mourning more than a year after the consequences of her marriage became public. She wrote: “I deeply miss the life of invisibility I created for myself as a psychologist specializing in women’s mental health.”

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Lilly Jay thinks better days are ahead after split from Ethan Slater

Ethan Slater's Wife Reportedly 'Destroyed' Over Romance With Ariana Grande
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Slater’s ex-wife shared more details about how caring for her son was helping her cope.

She explained: “I’ve learned that motherhood occupies your time, but not your mind. In the countless hours I spend rocking my son to sleep, pushing his stroller, marveling at his sweaty little hands clutching a crayon, I work diligently on my private life”. plan to accept the sudden public collapse of my marriage.

Jay continued: “This, I tell myself, is nothing to be ashamed of and nothing to hide. Little by little, I have come to believe that, in the absence of the life I planned with my high school girlfriend, a life of sweetness is waiting for us.” to me and my son.

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Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay’s Co-Parenting Dynamic

Ethan Slater's Wife Reportedly 'Destroyed' Over Romance With Ariana Grande
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Jay also wrote about how she and Slater were raising their son together, noting that their parenting remained the same even though their partnership had changed. She wrote, “We both love our son intensely 100 percent of the time, regardless of how our parenting time is divided.”

However, Jay admitted that she was still struggling with the fallout from her and Slater’s public divorce. She noted, “The days with my son are sunny. The days when I can’t escape the promotion of a movie associated with the darkest days of my life are darker.”

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The therapist also revealed that her public divorce affected her career, writing, “I can’t say for sure how much my career has been affected by what’s online. But there have been clues along the way, like the job offer that dissolved without explanation after another sensational news cycle or the patient who is scheduled for a first appointment but apparently disappears.

Ethan Slater and Lilly Jay’s divorce

Ethan Slater at opening night of Derren Brown: Secret Broadway - Arrivals
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Slater filed for divorce from Jay in July 2023, a month before their son’s first birthday. News of the divorce filing came after it was reported that Ariana Grande had ended her relationship with her ex-husband, Dalton Gomez.

Not long after filing for divorce, Slater and Grande began dating, and reports of their romance sparked a backlash on social media.

There was speculation that Slater cheated on Jay with Grande, although he and the singer have since debunked that narrative.

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Slater talks about his relationship with Grande

Ariana Grande gives her fans a big update on her future in music
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Slater broke his silence about his controversial relationship with Grande during an interview with GQ in October. He acknowledged that it was difficult for things about his private life to become a topic of public discussion.

The actor also said, “It’s really hard to see people who know nothing about what’s going on commenting and speculating, and then misunderstanding the people you love.”

However, Slater gushed about Grande, saying it was “a beautiful thing” to fall in love with her on set, before adding that he was proud of her and her work on “Wicked.”

Grande also addressed speculation about her and Slater’s relationship in a chat with vanity fair in September, expressing disappointment that many people believed the worst version of events.



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